September 12, 2006

And who are you?

I suddenly recalled that it was one of the reasons why I decided to leave. Last Dec. Because I didn't want you to lose your identity. Because I didn't want our colleagues to look at you and think you are a shadow of me, someone who only knew to turn to me, squat down beside my table, when things have gone wrong.

Even then, I had wanted you to have your own identity.

xxx

And I miss you, finally...

I really miss the little boys, the olive kids. A few times in the past two days, I kept wondering if it was a mistake to leave PL. I kept wondering what would the situation be like if I had not chosen to leave.

But, indeed, I have. For many, many reasons. And there is no turning back. Still, I miss them all, I miss you all.

xxx

No sleep

I didn't sleep well yesterday. I wonder why. 'Cos I was definitely tired. But when I went to bed, I tossed and when I got to sleep, I slept very lightly and woke up for no reason a few times. A few times when I woke up, I felt as if something was tearing at my heart. And it was beating fast. And the more I tried to think why I was like that, the faster it beat.

I went to the workshop feeling quite stoned. Di and Jul both asked if I was not feeling well. Sigh...

Di reminds me of Sera. =)

Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 21:36